answer i got from coolpoete from hellomotoq, from 2 replies
The 3rd ring is for the microphone. The 3.5mm standard headset plug is triggering that voice command feature. You have to use an adapter has 2 rings on it, if you can find one. It is very inconvenient that they design devices like this and it is probably because they want you to have to go out and buy their headsets. I found an adapter at the Verizon store for like $12 that allows you to plug in your own headset. It has a built-in microphone that solves the issue of the voice recognition. See the website below:
Dual Handsfree Stereo Adapter - Retractable Q (1st Generation) Handsfree Stereo Adapter / Retractable Motorola Q (1st Generation) Handsfree Stereo Adapter
One user mtg chimed in, isn't 2 rings mono audio....
yes, that's right but the adapter that magicman is using has 3 rings so it's triggering the voice activation because there's no microphone built on to it. I have a 2.5 mm earbud headphone set that I thought would work but when I tried plugging it in all the way the the voice activation dialog came up and it worked in Mono. I tried to see if I could get away with plugging it in half-way but I got a mono-signal in both ears and didn't want to run the risk of damaging the mechanism. A smart design to put a 2.5mm headphone jack on a supposed Multi-Media phone!
Solved it for me really quick...